Date: 8th November 2017 at 10:52am
Written by:

Noun: a word (other than a pronoun) used to identify any of a class of people, places, or things ( common noun ), or to name a particular one of these ( proper noun ).

noun: suspended animation

Vital Spurs Meaning:

The temporary cessation of most Vital Spurs functions without death, as in a dormant seed or a hibernating animal. Suspended Vital Spurs animation is the inducement of a momentary cessation of debate and fewer self-induced main body functions (i.e. Symptoms may include: wetting yourself when we go behind, and/or an extreme hike in Blood Pressure when we are at less than optimum performance), including the brain, to a hypometabolic state in order to try to preserve its mental and physiological capabilities which may present itself as an inability to post on Vital Spurs and/or a complete loss of interest in international Football, or in extreme cases of Spursitus; Life in general.

The International break

Well we know the score; Harry, Harry and Alli are sitting these ‘friendlies` out in an attempt to be ready for the North London Premier League War part 51 (more of that later) . Dier is desperate to play, Rose is recovering from his temporary mental aberrations and is fully committed and motivated once again and Trippier will be tripping the light fantastic down the right wing once again. The non-English Spurs Internationals have all been called up into what regularly turns into a tedious bore fest – even if for many of us it`s a full on ‘squeaky bottom` time as we await the news of meaningless casualties and scan the news feeds for post match injury reports.

Shades of ‘I counted them all out, and I counted them all back` as the injury and performances drama unfolds over the next two weeks sum up my feelings about the whole show.

Meaningless friendlies

As it does with every International break, opinions are divided between their need to allow national coaches to experiment and assess tactics, systems and player abilities and the wishes of Premier League fans and often Spurs fans that they`d rather they just die a quick death and this whole pointless exercise would simply fade away (which in 2022 the European friendlies are by the way, and being replaced with the European Nations Cup – which is of course an attempt by UEFA to fleece us even more than they do already).

The more cynical amongst us may well see the break as another English FA inspired conspiracy for extracting precious leisure time attention and devotion to a flawed national team that is desperately needed to pay for an insipid and uninspiring national stadium that continues to drain money away from what the FA should be doing much more of i.e. grass roots and much bigger national facilities investment.

Woeful Wembley

For those attending these friendly games it will of course need all of your National Pride and a big chunk of your hard-earned to meet the often-exorbitant costs of travel, food, tickets, drink and even overnight stays, or a day off of work, for many of my friends with families who don`t live in London it is now simply beyond their reach.

As you might have guessed, I`m utterly unimpressed with Wembley, the stadium and national games are reduced to giving free ‘clappers` for fans to use and listening to an incessant brass band that knows one tune. The facilities both in and outside of the ground are inadequate and over-priced. Try using the unattended, filthy toilets at half-time and getting yourself a drink/Luke-warm hot dog and getting back to your seat for the start of the second half, (unless you leave your seat five minutes before the half-time whistle), it`s a feat even Usain Bolt would struggle with – which brings me to another bugbear; when I don`t go (and I used to attend all home games), the number of times I`ve heard the cossetted, sycophantic presenters berate supporters for not being back in their seats for the start of the second half infuriates me – let them lucky so and so`s try and do the ‘Wembley dash`, they’d be screaming ‘foul’ before they’d laughed at the huge wedge of cash they get from the BBC for their inane often repetitive assessments.

Wembley is the result of allowing middle class farts the right to make the decision about a new national stadium; if the morons had listened to and considered some of the genuine ‘working; classes, today we`d have Internationals being played all over the country packed to the gunnels which would allow them to be logistically and financially accessible to all our youngsters and families and we`d be breeding a whole new generation of committed die-hard England fans rather than leaving our children to be even further entranced by ‘only` the Premier League.

As of now, this rant is over, but part II is already welling inside me.I’m just not sure you can stomach it right now.

The Future

So whilst I vent my spleen about the inadequacy of our National Stadium and our governing body and Vital Spurs goes into suspended animation for a week or two, perhaps we could all turn our attention to the state of the game; is the FA fit for purpose anymore, should we just hand it over to the Premier league, the Football league or petition the government to step in and reform it root and Branch?

Just how do we get our children back into the national stadium without forcing parents into penury for extended periods and is the national stadium unimprovable and do we have to live with fans being treated like cash cows?

Yep, the FA is the gift that just keeps giving; but only to those who can invade their cosy drinking circles and after match dinner club.

Over to you Vital posters; the intelligentsia of Football forums and social media? what do you think?


12 Replies to “Spurs Suspended Animation”

  • Geof, LOL! yes; I hate Wembley, I detest the FA, and money their grabbing friendlies and I’m terrified of more injuries…! πŸ™‚

  • Sorry for the typo in my reply Geof, doing too many things at the same time – or at least, trying too!

  • Regarding the obtaining of food issue at half time, perhaps we should adopt the methods used in the NFL with crowds similar in volume in many cases to Wembley and bring the food to the punters rather than the other way round. Regarding the usefulness of international “friendlies”, you only have to look at the difference in the quality of the team usually fielded in “friendlies” with those fielded in competitive international fixtures to assess their usefulness. It has long been the case that the top clubs and their switched on managers tend to suffer a glut of alleged minor injuries in the last PL games prior to the break and withdraw their “injured” players, although most in not all are fit to play in the PL immediately following the break. I am pleased to see that we are now joining in with his trend, that was perfected by Messrs Wenger, Ferguson and others, in protecting their players for the more important games ahead where results are vital for the clubs to continue to be able to pay the players exorbitant salaries. Players often return from tiresome and meaningless friendly internationals injured and unable to play for their clubs, and even as we found out with Ledley King, occasionally with career limiting injuries.

  • Funnily enough, in Belgium we are crying for a national stadium. The enthusiasm for the national team is much higher than for any of the clubs, and the current home of the Red Devils is none other than the old “Heysel”, now called Stade Roi Baudouin. It can seat 45.000 uncomfortably, which our FA has decided was better than playing games in our club stadiums (the biggest of which is in LiΓ¨ge and seats just over 30.000). There would be no point in making any of the club stadiums bigger – they would just be half empty for league games. So we are crying out for a national stadium with a capacity of 60.000+. Sadly Belgium is a complicated country with 3 regions who can’t decide on where the national stadium should be and who should pay for what. So despite the need for it and the desire for it, it will probably never happen.

  • Maybe the Belgium team could hire Wembley, until such time as a new National Stadium is one day, built. Another nice little earner for the FA?!

  • If I had my way I’d ship Wembley over to Belgium; all they’ve go to do is ask nicely πŸ™‚ It does for atmosphere what Juncker does for the EU….

  • Wembley doesn’t seem to have that x factor atmosphere unless it’s a real top game. question is why? the noise when we played RM was good from what I read, so why can’t that noise be maintained when we play stoke or burnley? and why can’t it be that way when England play a relative unknown team there? a lot of it is the fans, being selective as to when they make themselves heard. I also don’t buy into this idea that the team needs to get the fans interested. Some fans like Newcastle, Leciester, Huddlesfield seem to make a lot of noise even when their team are woeful and losing, I think our fans are not in that league and neither are the England fans.

    As for the facilities, I cannot remember what they are like, the last time I went was when we beat Chelsea in the cup, 2008 I believe.

    I think the whole energy around England is not really very positive because of so many years of not winning and poor performances. I am so glad Kane, Winks and Dele are not playing, don’t want any injuries and I was beginning to get worried about Kane, he didn’t seem to be busting a gut and moving so well against RM and Palace, since his hamstring, so I welcome this 2 weeks off and hope he recovers properly and I hope Winks is not rushed back and can recover properly, same with Dele.

    problem with these friedlies now is they are too far away from the real event to really have an impact. By the time the competition comes next year how many of these players will be on the plane? we know who are likely to be going unless they get injured and those who are not certain, poor performers we cannot really make a decision now in friendlies, we need to see the form of players nearer the time. For example: Sturridge, Vardy, Henderson, Wilshere, Sterling, all these sort of players cannot be assessed until the season is over or nearly over. I prefer to finish season earlier and then let the players have more time together after the season to prepare. If we finished the season 2 weeks earlier then players could meet up for extra 2 weeks and fit 2 friendlies in then, this time of year is utterly silly and serves noone. Do we need to be tinkering with formations. Do we need to know now how we can compete with the likes of germany. If we lose these 2 games, nothing we can do anyway until next get together which is time away. meeaninglesss

  • If you think Wembley is bad for the atmosphere, have a look at said Stade Roi Baudouin. It’s old, it’s got an athletics track round the pitch, no acoustics whatsoever, and metal caging ruining the view for the 1st 10 rows (the Nigel Farage of stadiums :-)? ). Yet the atmosphere can be quite good. I would argue that it the atmosphere at Wembley is worse, it’s down to the fans, not the stadium.

  • The atmosphere at Wembley is simply electric when compared with West Hams new home at “The Taxpayer Stadium” where you need binoculars to watch the game. Mind you pitch invasions will be rare, as any invader would be knackered by the time he gets to the pitch.

Comments are closed.